I realise this is a male-centric post, but please bare with me. I promise there will be something in it for everybody. I’m also aware that it’ll ruffle feathers and piss some people off – that too, is fine. Opinions are like ar*e-holes—everyone has one, or is one (yes that’s me).
We always aim to improve
It’s part of our genetic code to be unsatisfied with our ‘current’ body no matter how big, strong or athletic it may be.
I’d argue that MORE guys would want bigger muscles regardless of what their current physique looks like.
But what about my goals?
Ok, so it’s great to have goals and aspirations, but how do we know when we’ve ACTUALLY reached our goals? Is there a little wooden man that pops out of a 1952 cuckoo clock and says to you:
“Hey tiny-nuts, you’ve finally hit your genetic peak. You’ve won the prize. Thanks for playing!”
Ok, so that hardly ever happens…
But if you wake up one day and discover that your thighs are rubbing when you walk, you’re all out of egg-whites and the extra-small tee you used to wear FINALLY needs to be upgraded to a large, then perhaps its time to ease-off on the mass-building (and possibly the steroids). For the very simple reason, your size is going to cause you more problems within your social sphere (particularly with the ladies) than you realise.
These are the Top 5 reasons…
#1 Girls don’t rate guys that are too ‘big’
Have you ever been mistaken for a mini-van? Sure there are exceptions to the rule, but 9 out of 10 ladies (yes I made that up) would prefer their man to have a hollywood body (Taylor Lautner or Ryan Reynolds), than be jacked up like a condom full of walnuts.
Bulk and girth is apparently only desirable in the pants.
#2 Girls don’t like guys that have to constantly eat ALL of the time
Being ridiculously big means you have to EAT ridiculously big.
Do you find yourself scoffing down protein shakes at 3am and eating two t-bones in one sitting? This kind of behavior will annoy the sh*t out of your girl. Take it from me, I’ve been there.
The next time you’re staring at an over-loaded trolley full of chicken breasts in the supermarket and wondering how your going to turn that sh*t into palatable food for a week, you’ll know it’s time to ease-off a little.
#3 Girls dig a man with a neck
Necks are freakin important for gawking, turning to check your blind spot and for putting your head in the sand when someone writes a pointed article about you. Most girls i talk to equate a grossly thick neck and traps to a low IQ.
If you can shrug or shoulder press the Empire State Building, it’s probably time to skip the SECOND shoulder workout for the day, and just do the ONE.
#4 Girls like a man who’s in proportion
It’s always a surprise when you open up a small lunch-container to find a MASSIVE sandwich. This however, can’t be said when you open up the same said lunch-container to discover someone has forgotten to pack your lunch.
If your junk is suddenly resembling a button on a brick wall, it might be time to re-assess.
#5 Girls prefer to have bigger breasts than you do
I’m guessing there are exceptions to this rule too. However, if your pecs are dwarfing your lady’s fun-bags, it just might make her self-conscious enough to kick your ass to the curb.
Metaphorically speaking, tough-guy. Yes I know you would physically win.
If you AREN’T a pro body-builder, more than likely your reasons for becoming a mega-monster are based on what your mates are all trying to do. That’s called peer-pressure my friend.
Maybe to your friends you even seem ‘small’…
Just remember, whilst you’re out collecting booty and turning-down Hugo Boss shoots, your over-sized, thigh-rubbing friends will be at home either sleeping, eating or ‘knocking one out’ to add mass to their forearms.
Note: Actual Hugo Boss shoots, may not happen.
Editor’s Note: Believe it or not, even I was once told that I was ‘too big’. What are some other turn-offs caused by over-musculature? Comment below.